Grand Lake Golf Report January 2009

By Steve Pace, Certified Golf Instructor at Grove’s Patricia Island Golf Club

Email: stevepace.golf@yahoo.com   Phone: 918-257-4967

 

 

GOLF CLASSES SCHEDULED
Through the Northeast Career Tech-Afton we have set the schedule for this coming Spring classes. Call 918-257-8324 to schedule or go to www.netech.edu.

We have these classes at the Patricia Island Golf Club and we have indoor facilities if the weather is bad.

Class sizes are limited to 15.

Basic Class (Beginner’s welcome)

Monday 6 to 8 pm for next 3 Mondays (3/16, 23, 30)

Tuesday 6 to 8 pm for next 3 Tuesdays (3/17, 24, 31)

Intermediate Class (Basic continued)

Monday 6 to 8 pm for next 3 Mondays (4/13, 20, 27)

Tuesday 6 to 8 pm for next 3 Tuesdays (4/14, 21, 28)

 

PERSONAL

Well I’ve been keeping track of my emails advising me of my lottery and other winning’s. Most seem to come from Europe and did not require that I even had to try to win. I have won untold millions in pounds. I think that instead of paying my bills with American currency I am going to start paying double with little notes to my creditors stating that since I have won so much, I am just going to share part of it. I think I am in to the Billionaire category and thus probably owe more in taxes than I can imagine.

I wonder if I can get an advance on my winnings?

 

PRO REPORT

Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the national stage Ms. Cheyenne Woods of the Wake Forest University golf team. Now, you're probably thinking, "Hmmm ... something familiar about that surname there ..." Is she a relative of actor James Woods? The great-great-granddaughter of George Lemeul Woods, governor of the Utah territory? No, that's not it ...

Cheyenne’s uncle is the one and only Tiger Woods and not only looks like Tiger but also plays (and wins) like Tiger. Look for her to be parading on the LPGA tour in a few years.

 

Thank you, Chad Campbell. Thank you so much, my man. You have given all of us guys who go and screw up a date -- what do you mean, you didn't get reservations? -- a baseline, a floor upon which to stand, a big ol' target to hide behind. After all, it's not every day somebody flies all the way to Hawaii and still manages to royally screw up.

The background: Campbell was planning to play in the current Sony Open; he'd been runner-up in the tourney back in '06. He loaded up the clubs and flew eight hours to Hawaii from his home in Dallas, landing in Hawaii on Saturday. One problem, he needed to register for the tournament by Friday.  No registration, no playing. No shirt, no shoes, no dice.

 

Me, I'd've tried to fly across the International Date Line or some such, see if that worked -- or at the bare minimum, duct-taped Luke Donald in his hotel room and taken his place -- but Campbell took the higher road. He and his caddy played one round of golf,

then took a redeye back to Dallas.

Sixteen hours in the air for three hours of golf. Eh, beats working. But here's betting there's a Day Planner in Campbell's future.

 

GOLF TIP of the WEEK

When you grip your putter put the grip as far in to your palms as you can;

When you grip your regular club, put the grip in to your fingers, as if holding a bucket full of water.

 

GOLF JOKE of the WEEK

A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they made passionate love all afternoon. Exhausted from their activities, they fell asleep and awoke at around 8 p.m. As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied and he slipped into his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been?" demanded his wife when he entered the house.

"Darling," replied the man, "I can't lie to you. I've been having an affair with my secretary and we've been together all afternoon. I fell asleep and didn't wake up until eight o'clock."

The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, "You liar! You've been playing golf!"

 

Keep it in the Middle!

Steve